Friday, March 06, 2009

Saying Goodbye



My grandfather passed away Wednesday morning, he was 91. I'm not going to write a whole lot about him here, partly because I'm trying to get ready to take off for Chicago and partly because this is a family thing, not a blog thing. But I did want to give him a little bit of a cyberspace tribute. The photo was not my first choice either but it was the best I could find in a pinch.

I lived with my grandparents starting at age 6 or so and he was the nearest thing I had to a father growing up so losing him is much more than losing a grandfather to me. At the heart of it he was a good man and towards the latter years of his life his family was the most important thing to him. He seemed most happy and relaxed when he was on vacation with the family. His work was important to him to and he carried on well into his 80's until the Alzheimer's made it impossible for him. He was also played racquetball well into his 80's and often beat guys in their 60's.

His loss will be devastating for my grandmother. I had to lobby very hard for the family to have some sort of gathering for him beyond dinner with the immediate family because they felt she couldn't handle it. But I think it’s important and necessary to the grieving process to have a day where people can come to the house and pay their respects and that if she doesn’t have it she’ll come to regret it. Doesn’t have to be at the temple since no one in the family is terribly religious and I can see not wanting to shell out a bunch of money to a funeral home but I felt they needed to do something and I’m not a fan of ceremonies in general (we barely had a wedding). I was talking to a friend who’s family also decided not to do anything when her grandmother died and she said it was terrible for her not having that sense of closure. So I’m glad I put up a fight about it and hopefully my grandmother will make it through the day and be thankful for it in the end.

5 comments:

  1. I am sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing.

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  2. I am terribly sorry for your loss.

    Butt sniffs,
    Solid Gold Dancer

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  3. Anonymous12:59 PM

    We'll keep you in our hearts. My grandpa was the only male role model I had growing up, so I know that kind of loss. I'm so sorry to hear the news. Our best to you and your gram.

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  4. Here's my deepest sympathy. Just your short description of him is a worthy tribute, because it makes him sound wonderful. And the photo's great--his smile looks woarm and genuine, and he's in all that outdoors.

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  5. Thank you all for all your kind words.

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